Friday, July 15, 2005
Patience is not a virtue of a crazy girl
I hate waiting. I hate getting bored. That is maybe one of the reasons why I am aggressive. I want things to happen quickly. I have a short attention span.
When watching TV and there are commercials, I need to have a book with me so I can do something during commercial breaks. If I don't have a book, I would channel surf. I cannot stay put in just one channel during commercials. If I don't have a book and I cannot channel surf because Mama has the control, I would look for other ways to occupy my time such as cutting my finger nails or organizing my closet.
When I was still riding the shuttle to and from work, I would always bring a book with me so I can read or my headsets so I listen to the built-in radio of my cellphone while waiting for a van or while travelling.
While driving, I cannot just drive. I need to have the radio on. I need to be able to station surf. If I get tired with what's playing on the radio, I pop a cd into the player. If the traffic is terrible and I'm tired of both the radio and my cds, I text people. If the people I'm texting takes more than a minute to reply, I start calling them to complain about the traffic and how late I am. Maybe this is one reason why I pay more than P3,000.00 for my cellphone bills as well as an additional P3,000.00 for participation fee to be paid to my car insurance.
At work, I cannot just work. I need to have my Winamp and my mp3s playing on the background. My Trillian should be running because when I get bored after every 5 minutes, I need to be able to chat with someone. Be it Trexyl, Leny, Tita Ciel, Kartika, Marianne, Joanne, Apple or Red. When I get my momentum back, then I start concentrating on my work again.
When it comes to relationships, I am also impatient. I want things to happen quickly. I want decisions to be made quickly. I usually decide where to eat and what to order or what movie to watch or where to go.
Now I am experiencing my quarter-life crisis. 'Expert's say that this is experienced by young people who move to fast and acquire too much too fast or accomplish too much too fast that they cannot or have a hard time feeling contentment.
But I don't feel as if I've accomplished anything or acquired anything. Maybe that's why I am having this crisis. Or maybe I am just going too fast. Maybe I need to slow down a bit. Smell the roses, enjoy the scenery.
So I can conclude that what I really need is a long and fruitful vacation.
A long and fruitful vacation in the USA or Bangkok or England.
Family and friends, please sponsor me! I need your financial help! Or else I will definitely and certifiably become crazy.
I go crazy, crazy, baby, I go crazy You turn it on Then you're gone Yeah you drive me Crazy, crazy, crazy, for you baby What can I do, honey I feel like the color blue... --- Crazy, Aerosmith
Maan @ 12:11 AM
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