Kabaliwan ni Maan

Sunday, August 28, 2005
How will I Know if I Met the Person I Should Marry?

How will I Know if I Met the Person I Should Marry?

by Gary Cruz

The choice of a marriage partner should not be based on "I get a warm, wonderful feeling whenever we're together and I want to have that warm wonderful feeling forever, so let's go get married". Feelings have no logic on their own. They need to be acknowledged, of course, but they need considerable assistance from your brain.

Marriage means choosing the person you will spend the rest of your life with. This, as you may have guessed, is a very long time to spend with one person. You should be ready to share your life with this person. This person will live with you, eat meals with you, sleep with you, and go on vacation with you. More important yet, this person will share your children. You need to choose wisely. The decision should not be made based on feelings alone. You need to ask yourself some tough questions. The decisions have to be made on solid considerations. Remember to look at the "big picture".

Will this person be a good partner? Is she mature enough to put her own selfish desires aside to look out for what is best for the family? Is he prepared to be a good provider? What is his track record? Is he responsible enough to get a good job and keep it? How does this person feel about love, commitment, and responsibility?

Do you ask yourself, "This person would be perfect if..."? If you find yourself doing that, or if that person is doing that to you, a compromise needs to take place. Do you ask too much from this person? Does this person ask too much of you? When you are in love, insignificant perceived "imperfections" shouldn't matter. If you want to change someone into your "perfect mate" just realize that change doesn't happen overnight, and may take several years - if it even happens. Ever heard of the saying, "You should love people for who they are, not what they can potentially become"?

Does your mate love their family? Does their parents approve of you or vice-versa? This is very important in Filipino culture, but extends to anyone. These people will be your future "in-laws" that you will spend holidays with, family reunions, etc. Also, if you feel that this person was raised well, chances are, they will instill the same values in your future children.

Will this person be a good parent? Can you stand the thought of your children turning out exactly like this person? They will, you know. Children spend a lot of time with their parents and consequently pick up many or most of their parents' character traits. You had better like your spouse's traits a lot because you will be seeing them again in your children.

If something were to happen to you, would you completely trust this person, alone, with the ask of raising and forming your children? This is not a pleasant thought, but it is an important consideration. Not everyone dies at a ripe old age with great grandchildren gathered around the bed. Sometimes a parent dies and leaves young children in the care of the other parent. If you feel that you would need to be around to correct or lessen this person's influence on your children,then you are considering the wrong person.

Does this person share your faith in God? God does not give us children so that we can mold them into the coolest, most popular people in school. Our job is to get them to heaven. To do that, we need to raise them believing in God. It is tough to do that if only one parent believes. Saying "this is right and this is wrong, and I want you to ignore Mommy until you are thirty-five" does not work. Small children ask about eight billion questions in a single day. The answers to those questions go a long way toward forming the kind of adults they will become. Who will be answering those questions for your children?

Does this person you are marrying have sexual self-control? Single people sometimes have this idea that marriage is just some kind of lifelong sex festival and that as long as they have each other, they will never be tempted by other people. Wrong! There are many times in every marriage when one partner or the other is sexually unavailable do to illness, the last months of pregnancy, and travel. There are also times when spouses just get on each others' nerves. At times like this, other people can seem very appealing. That can be dangerous, because there are plenty of very attractive people out there who are willing to make them available to married men and women. Do you want someone who has never said "no" to sex? If he is not good at saying "no" at eighteen, it won't be different at forty. Do you want to worry about whether or not your spouse is being faithful?

These are very important questions, and if you are not comfortable with all of the answers, you should definitely not marry this person. Remember, people are not "security blankets". Get to know yourself and know what you want - because if you figure it out later, after you are married with kids, you'll have a whole lot of issues to deal with besides their character, personality, and physical flaws.

None if this is to say that feelings play no role at all in a marriage decision. You don't have to say to yourself, "Well, I suppose that you would make a good spouse and parent, so even though I don't particularly like you I guess I'll marry you". You need to be happy and excited about the prospect of spending your life with someone. Your brain however must acknowledge that this person as a good catch. You'll both will "know" when you both feel lucky and thank God every day for each other.

Don't listen to your heart alone or your head alone. Wait until your heart and head agree.

Maan @ 11:58 PM
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Saturday, August 27, 2005
Last day of the term!

Today would be my last class in Business Communications. Later, I'm going to take our Final Exam which I haven't studied for. I am hoping thay my stocked knowledge about english grammar would be enough to get me through.

I'm going to miss my morning class in Buscom. I'm going to miss sitting beside Trexyl, not listening and just whispering loudly to each other, me doodling in Trexyl's notebook or writing small messages like, "Hi!" or "Kain tayo." I'm going to miss having saturday lunch with my girlfriends, going to the mall with them, having our manicure and pedicure at CANS or our hair done while talking about our lives, loves, heartaches, heartbreaks, frustrations, dreams and hopes.

Me and Trex fooling around with Trex's K750i during Buscom class

This is my last term in PGDM if I get to pass FINACC and BUSCOM. I have to say that I am glad I was enrolled in PGDM and not in MBA. If not for PGDM, there wouldn't be any Saturday Night Out, I wouldn't be able to meet my NFFs - Trexyl, Marianne and Thea who made studying a little bit easier.

I'm not going to start with my MBA next year. I think I'm going to 'rest' for a term and just concentrate on my work. I want to be more efficient with my job. I hate this feeling of frustration and always worrying about back-logs and other stuff to do. I want to be able to feel the excitement and enthusiasm to work. I want to be able to get up at 6AM and be at the office by 8AM and be able to go home by 5 or 6PM. I'm so frustrated with work right now because I want to do a lot of things but I can't seem to do all of them. Thea said that we spread ourselves so thinly that we miss out on the details. Thea told me just last wednesday that we should aim for reachable goals so we won't get frustrated with work.

Reachable goals? What's that? I want to challenge myself. So I will dream the impossible dream, fight the unbeatable foe and bear the unbearable sorrow. In short, I want to make my life a living hell. Just kidding. =)

---

I went to Rockwell yesterday with my officemates because I was so excited to go to Globe so I can get a new cellphone. They have this on-going promo for postpaid subscribers which lets us pay for the unit for 18 months with 0%. When I got there, I was so disappointed because the unit that I like, Sony Ericsson K750i, costs so much. It was so expensive! God knows how much I need to save. Nagagalit na nga si Red because I want so many things. So I decided that it woud be best if I switch to Smart since our company has a discount on the handsets. Next week, Malou of Smart will give me a call to inform me if I can get the K750i for a discount. I'm already excited!

---

Since I went to Hub in Rockwell, we can't help but visit the Ipod store in front of Hub. I had to drool all over again after seeing the pink iPod Mini and the 40GB iPod. I am torn between the iPod and the pink iPod Mini. According to Jas, the iPod is so worth it. I also want to buy the speakers which are compatible with the iPod so I can listen to my mp3s without putting on the headset or earphones. If I can just get my hands on this Hot Pink iPod which I saw over the internet...

---

It's 4AM and I've been browsing through our Buscom hand-outs. I'm trying to study but I know that it's futile. Anything I read will be forgotten in a few hours.

So friends, wish me luck! I hope I'll pass both FINACC and BUSCOM so by January 2006 I can already start with my MBA.

---

this is our last goodbye
i hate to feel the love between us die
but it's over just hear this and then i'll go
you gave me more to live for more
than you'll ever know

this is our last embrace
must i dream and always see your face
why can't we overcome this wall
well, maybe it's just because i didn't know you at all

kiss me, please kiss me
but kiss me out of desire, babe, and not consolation
you know it makes me so angry
'cause i know that in time i'll only make you cry,
this is our last goodbye

did you say "no, this can't happen to me,"
and did you rush to the phone to call
was there a voice unkind in the back of your mind
saying maybe you didn't know him at all
you didn't know him at all, oh, you didn't know

well, the bells out in the church tower chime
burning clues into this heart of mine
thinking so hard on her soft eyes
and the memories offer signs that it's over... it's over

-- Last Goodbye, Jeff Buckley from the Vanilla Sky OST

Maan @ 4:15 AM
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Friday, August 26, 2005
What I Want

I want lots and lots and lots of things. I want to do lots and lots and lots of stuff. Unfortunately, money is an issue. Hay! Pera. Ang hirap kumita ng pera. But what is money? Paper only. Hindi rin.

So here's a couple of things that I want to buy if I have the extra cash or if someone would be nice enough to buy them for me:

1. Havaianas - these slippers look like your ordinary day-to-day spartan. Unfortunately, these flip-flops are not as cheap as the regular ones which you can buy in the nearest palengke. The cheapest pair would cost you around P600++. Last week, when I accompanied Anna to Rockwell to buy her metallic gold havaianas, I was so tempted to buy the baby pink ones. But I just remembered thatI have almost no money left in my account because I paid for my credit card bills. I know it's NOT WORTH IT but I still want to have a pair of Havaianas. I think I'm already obsessed by it. Like they say, you only covet the things you cannot have.

2. Sony Ericsson K750i - I am actually a Nokia Girl. Nokia is so user-friendly. I can navigate throught the menus and even compose text messages even if I'm still half-asleep. That's why it's hard for me to switch to a different cellphone brand. But the K750i has managed to capture my heart. This is Trexyl's phone and she said she is very happy with it. So I just might get this one. If it's too expensive, I'll settle for the Nokia 3230. Now this is something that I really need. I need to change my cellphone. Masyado ng inaapi ang Nokia ko sa office.

-----
Aside from material things, I am still hoping and wishing for a lot of things. I wish that I will be able to stop procrastinating and to start with our financial analysis and reaction paper for FINACC. I want to take a break from work and go on a vacation with Red and/or with my friends and go somewhere I've never been before like Boracay, Palawan, Hong Kong, China. Or re-visit great places I've been to like Baguio, Cagayan de Oro, Cebu or Davao. I wish I can have the extra money to pay for my US VISA application and hopefully my tourist VISA will be approved so I can visit my brother, my dad, my lolo and my friends in the US.

Oh well. Everything has it's right place and right time. For now, I better to do things that I can do like my financial analysis and reaction paper (which is due today).

Maan @ 12:38 AM
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Monday, August 22, 2005
Guess what...

Maan and Red at Gerry's Grill ATC

A picture is worth a thousand words.

Maan @ 1:08 AM
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Saturday, August 13, 2005
I can write a book or sing my life away

"Maan, you can write a book!"

That was what Kartika used to tell me whenever I would go to her desk, pull a chair to sit beside her and exclaim, "Karts! Guess what! May kwento ako sa'yo."

In my 25 years of living, I cannot say that I have experienced it all. I also cannot say that my experiences are unique and one-of-a-kind. Truthfully, I am a late bloomer and everything I am going through right now has been experienced by almost everyone around me. So what they usually tell me whenever I tell them something new about me is, "Been there, done that." But if I were to quote again Kartika, it would be, "Been there, been that."

Last weekend, I called up Jas to tell her that I've been crying my eyes out for nights on end. Sagot nya, "Hay naku! Ganyan din ako dati. Sa sobrang iyak ko nakabuo na ako ng swimming pool." I can always count on Jas to make my problems seem petty and trivial and to find the humor in it by comparing it to her experiences which during the time she was experiencing them, I deemed petty and trivial.

As of today, I feel so sad that I feel as if I can write a whole book about my sadness and misery. But then again, I am sure that no one will buy that book. Before, when I had the luxury of watching Maalaala Mo Kaya, I would tell Mama, "Ma, padala kaya natin life story natin." Then she would reply, "Naku! Ang corny-corny ng buhay natin. Hindi interesting. Hindi tayo mapipili para sa Maalaala." I guess she's right.

But of course since I am the one with a problem and I am the one who's miserable, I want the whole world to listen to me and be miserable with me. Like they say, misery loves company.

Yan na naman ako. Being selfish and self-centered.

I remember Trexyl singing in the cab, on our way back to the office from our lunch at Gerry's Grill, "Walang sino man ang nabubuhay para sa sarili lamang. Walang sino man ang namamatay para sa sarili lamang."

We laughed about it. Even the cab driver was laughing. But deep down I was hurting because I know it's true. I have been selfish. I have been unkind. I have been self-centered. Pero tao lamang ako. Nagkakamali, natutukso, nagkakasala.

So Trexyl sings again, "Dibaaaaa.... ako'y tao lang na nadadarang at natutukso rin...." Hiram by Zsa Zsa Padilla? How appropriate.

In class, I cannot help but ask for advice from my close friend, Joe. Joe, the guy who was two-timed by his girlfriend of 3 years. He caught his girlfriend, now ex-girlfriend, cozying up to another guy when he visited her in UST to surprise her for their 3rd anniversary. Yes. I asked for advice from this guy because I wanted brutal honesty and the bitter truth.

"Joe! Joe! Bakit ganun? Kasalanan ko. Nagsisisi ako. Anung gagawin ko?"

Then a classmate exclaimed from the background, "Dear Joe... Maan, love problem ba yan? Tamang-tama. Tanung mo kay Joe." Joe D Mango? Hindi rin.

Joe had his laptop. While typing something, he told me, "Give it time, Maan. Nasaktan mo sya. If the two of you are meant to be, then it will happen. If not, then it won't. Only time can tell. So here is my song for you..."

Sabay play ng mp3 ng Tell Me Where It Hurts by MYMP.

"I'm sorry pero ayoko ang song na yan. I think the more applicable song would be..."

Then I started singing, while using my bottle of Coke Light as a microphone, "Kung liligaya kaaaa..... sa piling ng iba....... at kung ang langit moooooooo.... ay ang pag-ibig nya....."

Yes, I am a horrible, horrible singer. I believe I am tone deaf. I love music but it does not love me. While in the middle of my horrible singing, Thea (who is supposed to be a good friend of mine) commented on my singing, "Naku. Hindi pa lasing yan. Hintayin natin pag nalasing."

----
Sa totoo lang, walang halong biro, nalulungkot ako ngayon. But I just have to find the humor in my daily life inspite of the sadness and the misery. If I don't, I just might go crazy.

I recently talked to a friend and told him about my dilemma.

He told me, "If you love him then fight for it."

How ironic because I was the one who used to tell him that. To fight for it if he thinks she's worth the fight.

But would you still continue fighting in a losing battle?

Maan @ 12:20 PM
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Friday, August 12, 2005
Sayang

Tulay ng salitang di matawid.
Panghihinayang sa di mapahiwatig.

Kung lilisan ka na, sinong papalit sa iyo?
Sayang, sayang, sayang

Pag-isipan muna, baka mapag-usapan.
Sabi mo nga dumarating lang ‘to minsan

Ngayon umaayaw ka na…

Kung lilipas ka na, sinong papalit sa iyo?
Sayang, sayang, sayang

Hangang bukas na lang,
Hangang bukas na lang… ang langit.

Kung lilisan ka na, sinong papalit sa iyo?
Sayang, sayang, sayang

Wag lang itapon limang taong samahan.
Gagawin ang lahat, mapabalik ka lang.

--- Sayang, Stonefree

Maan @ 11:10 PM
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Wednesday, August 10, 2005
You've Got Mail

I'm so sad. To the point that I feel like not doing anything and doing everything all at the same time. Right now, I am watching You've Got Mail. I just love this movie and I hope that after watching it for the nth time, it would make me a little bit happier and a little less sad.

I love everything about the movie and I mean EVERYTHING. The plot. The characters. The lines. The soundtrack. I can watch this movie over and over again and not get tired of it. If I can only have a copy of the script and have the time to memorize all the lines, I would.

Some of my favorite lines from the movies which I am just waiting to use in real life, or maybe not. Some of these lines just make me cry:

Kathleen: What will NY152 say today I wonder. I turn on my computer. I wait impatiently as it connects. I go online, and my breath catches in my chest until I hear three little words: You've got mail. I hear nothing. Not even a sound on the streets of New York, just the beating of my own heart. I have mail. From you.

Frank: What about you, is there someone else?
Kathleen: No. No, but, but there's the dream of someone else.

Kathleen: So much of what I see reminds me of something I read in a book, when should it be the other way around?

Joe Fox: You know, sometimes I wonder...
Kathleen Kelly: What?
Joe Fox: Well... if i hadn't been "Fox Books" and you hadn't been "The Shop Around the Corner," and you and I had just met...
Kathleen Kelly: I know.
Joe Fox: Yeah, yeah. I would've asked for your number. And I wouldn't have been able to wait 24 hours before calling you up and saying, Hey, how about... oh, how about some coffee, or drinks, or dinner, or a movie... for as long as we both shall live?

Joe Fox:You can forgive this guy for standing you up, but you can't forgive me for this little thing... of putting you out of business?

Joe Fox: Don't you love New York in the fall? It makes me wanna buy school supplies. I would send you a bouquet of newly sharpened pencils if I knew your name and address. On the other hand, this not knowing has its charms.

Joe Fox: Don't cry, Shopgirl. Don't cry.
Kathleen Kelly: I wanted it to be you. I wanted it to be you so badly.

Kathleen: It's coming on Christmas. They're cutting down trees. Do you know that Joni Mitchell song? I wish I had a river I can skate away on. Such a sad song. And not really about Christmas at all but I was thinking about it tonight as I was decorating my Christmas tree. Unwrapping funky ornaments made of popsicle sticks and missing my mother so much I almost couldn't breathe. I always miss my mother at Christmas but somehow it is worst this year since I need some advice from her. I need her to make me some cocoa and tell me that everything that is going badly in my life will sort itself out.

Maan @ 12:14 AM
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Sunday, August 07, 2005
A day with friends

My whole saturday was spent hanging out with my classmates.

For the first time in Buscom Class history, I was able to come in class on time. Even Chandra, our Indonesian classmate was surprised that he told me when I got in, "Maan, for the first time!"

It was a fun class because there were no lectures. We just watched our classmates do their speech then we graded them based on our presentation. A lot of them were quite good so now I am pressured to do a really good presentation. Sana di ako mautal, wrong grammar or wrong pronunciation.

After our class, our class had lunch at this Chinese resto in Rob Place with our professor. Since Trexyl's already using her new Ericsson cellphone with a built-in camera, we had a great time taking pictures while waiting for the food which took about 10 years to come. Sa sobrang gutom namin, Trex, Joe and I were already eating our rice without any ulam. Actually, inulam nalang namin yung toyo w/ calamansi and chilli sauce na ginawa ni Trexyl.

After lunch, we did a little window shopping and I ended up buying the bronze beads at Body Shop which was discounted at 50%. I wasn't planning on buying anything but I got pressured by the sales girl. So I promise myself that next time, di na ako magpapadala sa sales talk. Buti nalang di ako bumili nung Olive Oil Body Mist.

We then headed to Makati to go to Trexyl's condo since Trex and her group mates in Manpri will be discussing their case. I, on the other hand, had a fully body massage in Trex's condo while they were discussing. It felt so good!

After my massage, dumating si Anton. He was my classmate from my past terms. He's part of Trex's group for Manpri. Anton and I are not really close but we joke around in class. What can I do? I'm a friendly person. So it actually was a nice surprise for me to get to know Anton last saturday and it was also nice talking to him. He gave me a lot of insights.

Anton: Maan, long time, no see.
Maan: Anton! Mukha nga. Ang haba na ng hair mo. Di ka na skin head.
Anton: Oo nga eh. Tagal na nga.
Maan: Balita ko engaged ka na. Congrats!
Anton: Oo. Ikakasal na ako. Pakasal ka na rin.
Maan: Oo ba! Kung gusto mo pa mauna pa ako sayo eh.
Anton: Sabi mo yan ah.

And that's how our conversation started.

Anton, congratulations. I know that you and your fiancee will be very happy with each other. Thanks for the talk. I've learned a lot from you.

At around 9PM, they decided to wrap things up and call it night. Glenn came over and invited us to go to East 19 which is in Sucat to watch this band named Krishna. So Glenn, Trex, Allan and I went. Since south naman yun, I cannot say no. Also, libre ni Glenn ang entrance and libre ni Allan ang food. Buti nalang because P20 nalang ang laman ng wallet ko.

At 12MN, I told them that I need to go home. I slept for about 3 hours only the night before and I already wanted to rest my mind and my body.

I got home before 1AM and went straight to bed.

Maan @ 7:50 PM
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Monday, August 01, 2005
NOTHING FEELS QUITE LIKE A BROKEN HEART

A broken heart is the single greatest pain you will ever have to endure, in fact, the most hurt you can ever imagine: and the one who commits this emotional crime is not someone you hate; it is not een someone you dislike. No, because the only person who is capable of breaking your heart is the one who holds it precariously in their hands, the one with whom you have shared your dreams, your secrets, your fears - the one you love more than anybody else in the world... and therein lies the irony.

However, that is the chance you take. Love is all about risk. If you give your heart to someone else - as most of us do at one time or another - it is theirs to do with as they wish. You now have absolutely no control over it, and whether it remains intact is up to them.

Heartbreak is an odd kind of pain, because you are not dying. You are not even sick. For all intents and purposes you are perfectly fine, yet inside - where your heart used to be - you hurt so much that you can't breathe, you can't sleep, and you can't stop the tears from falling. You may eat too much; you may not eat at all. Non-smokers light up; non-drinkers find a bar.
A broken heart is the world's great equalizer,because it can bring even the strongest man to
his knees.

It happens to the best of us, they say. Time heals everything, they say. What doesn't kill us can only make us stronger, they say. And my personal favorite - it is better to have loved and lost then never to have loved at all. Yeah, right. BULLSHIT, I say.

You will listen to any advice you are given - take a walk, take a holiday, join a gym, get a haircut - because everybody over the age of consent thinks they have an Honors Degree in Heartache. Too much TV!!!

At the end of it all though you won't actually take any of this armchair psychology seriously, because you are STUBBORN, and because nobody else knows what the hell you are going through anyway. I mean, how could they?

It's your heart that lies bleeding on the floor next to you, not theirs. It's your tears. It's your pain for God's sake!

It's easy to spot someone who has just had their heart broken. You'll see them out walking
aimlessly, like extras from a zombie flick, muttering to themselves in a language only they
understand. Every now and then one of them is run down by a passing truck or bus. Man,

LOVE REALLY IS BLIND! Not that it really matters anyway. It's survival of the fittest. Nothing personal.

How long does it take to get over a broken heart? It's simple really. NEVER. There is no glue to mend that kind of thing; no bandage, no quick fix. All you can do is bend down, pick up the pieces, and hope you have enough there to find a little happiness once the tears have dried on your cheeks. Sure, you move on, you go out with other people, you smile, you laugh, you love again, you get married, you have two-point-four children, you collect your pension, YOU DIE.
You may very well have a good life, a great life even - but that break is ALWAYS there.

There may be days, weeks - months even - when it doesn't cross your mind at all, but don't go fooling yourself into thinking the pain has gone.You have it tucked away along with all your best kept secrets. You will be on your deathbed and through the haze of your memory the only thing you will know for sure is what happened to your heart all those years ago.

Very few people go through life unscathed - only the LUCKY ONES amongst us. Love is a bumpy ride. Most of us have to endure a few scratches and scrapes along the way, a couple of bruises, a fracture or two, and then that final rite of passage into adulthood - the broken heart. Pat yourself on the back; you are now in the club. You never wanted to sign up, I'm sure, but you're here for life. 'Til death us do part, baby.

Get over it!

---

Earlier this morning, I was able to chat with my bestfriend who is happily married and living in the US. She said she couldn't sleep so she asked me of we can chat for a while. Kung kelan ka nga naman maraming ginagawa, dun maraming gustong makipag-chat sayo. Then she told me the reason why she thinks she can't sleep.

Her little sister and the husband has gone to Splitsville. After about 6 months of marital bliss, the guy called it quits. The guy said that he fell out of love. Of course her little sister, who is also a good friend of mine, tried to work things out. Even though the guy moved out of their place, she still stayed hoping that they can fix things and make their marriage work. But she found out that the guy has been cheating on her. That made her give up on their marriage. She packed all her things, left with their son and went back to her mom's place.

I sympathize with her. Ang sakit ng iwanan ka ng taong mahal mo at ipagpalit sa iba. But that's the reality of things. People fall in love and hope and pray that it will be like that forever and ever. But shit happens. People fall out of love. If only we can control our hearts to fall in and out of love whenever we please. But that's not how life goes.

I told my bestfriend that I would love to react violently. To get angry at the guy. But I can't. Because even if I know that the guy has been selfish by turning his back on his family and choosing "the other woman" or maybe just choosing to be single again, somehow I still empathize with the guy. Does he have to stay in a loveless marriage? If the feeling is gone, should he suffer and in the long run make his wife suffer also? Should they continue living together as one happy family when the reality of things is that one or the other is not anymore in love? If you were the girl, will you be the martyr and choose to stay married even though you know that your husband has already fallen out of love?

A lot of couples stay in a relationship even after the love has gone. One of the major factors is that they want to be able to give their child or children a happy home, a complete family. But isn't it a bit hypocritical to stay in a marriage even though there's no more love and just bitterness and fighting? Wouldn't that do more damage to all parties involved rather than just going your separate ways but still being good parents to your kids. You may not be a good husband or wife, but that does not mean you cannot be an extraordinary parent to your kids.

I know that the sister of my bestfriend is hurting so much right now. I know that she is praying night and day. Praying for what specifically, I don't know. Maybe she is praying to God to help her get through this. To help her let go of her husband and forget about him and be able to move on. Maybe she is praying for strength to be able to raise their son by herself. Maybe she is not praying for their marriage to work, or maybe she still is. Maybe she is not praying for the guy to fall in love with her again. Maybe she is praying that she may fall out of love for the guy.

But in fairness to the both of them, I believe that they got married because they love one another and they believed that they will be together forever. I believe that the guy loved my friend so much. That he never meant to hurt her. He never meant to fall out of love. Nobody wants to fall out love. But like I said, things like falling out of love happens.

When things like this happen, look at the bright side. Like they say, every gray cloud has a silver lining. Kung hindi mo sya nakilala, kung hindi mo sya minahal, hindi nyo rin mabubuo ang isang batang mahal na mahal nyo.

Maan @ 11:52 PM
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The Good Stuff

Fickle-minded: Should I get the yellow beads? The blue ones, the red or the green?

In Glorietta, window-shopping but buying nothing

I ran into a couple of bad luck these past three days, but I will not blog about them because they are ought to be forgotten and not remembered.

So I would rather blog about the good things that happened to me these past few days.

Last friday was Glenn's birthday as well as the start of Ayala's Midnight Madness. Good thing that Glenn's birthday bash was moved from 7 to 8:30 PM so I was still able to do a little window shopping and hang out at Starbucks Glorietta with Leny, Leng and Aga. I didn't order because I was looking forward to Glenn's dinner treat so the four of us just talked about senseless and funny stuff and I guess we consciously avoided talking about the serious things in our lives. For once, I just wanted to chill and forget about my worries and problems. Around 9PM, I headed to Greenbelt to meet up with Glenn and my other classmates.

For more details, on how we celebrated Glenn's birthday, please visit Saturday Night Out. I'll blog about it this week when I have the time. But let me just mention the two highlights of the night:

1. Don and I are friends again. Quoting from Don's text to Thea, "It is nice to reconcile with a good friend."
2. Glenn unloaded a heavy load and finally told us his secret.

Saturday, Thea and I decided to go to Bench Fix Salon to do something about our lifeless and boring hair. We both decided to have our hair cellophaned while Sarah just accompanied us. Thea picked chocolate brown as her color and Amy - the gay stylist - picked out this really light brown color for my hair. At first I really freaked out. I told him, "Amy, ayoko maging anak araw ang buhok ko ah. Baka akalain ng tao batang kalye ako dahil sa buhok ko." But since he was the stylist, I trustes his decision. So this girl started to put this white goo on my hair and then wrapped it in cellophane. Maybe that's why they call it cellophane. It stayed there for about 30 minutes then she rinsed it off. At first, I can't see the color of my hair because it was wrapped in a towel. Sarah and I were in suspense. I told Sarah that I will definitely cry if my hair turns out to be a shocking shade of light brown. Then viola! The towel was removed and the color of my hair is... STILL BLACK!

Oh well. Virgin hair. What else can they do? So I told Amy to just trim my hair and style it a little by putting layers on the side. I always love this style but I cannot seem to re-create it by myself. So tomorrow, I bet tikwas na naman buhok ko.

After Bench Fix, we went to Starbucks for merienda because we didn't eat lunch then started to window shop. My goal was actually to buy a pair or two of new shoes and maybe a bag. I ended up buying this white cardigan.

Unfortunately, we cannot conquer Glorietta and Landmark in a day. After about 3 hours of walking, our feet got tired and my back was already hurting. Thea decided to go home already while Sarah and I had dinner in Italianni's. I have to say that this was a very expensive saturday! I don't want to see my credit card anymore.

Sunday was the birthday party of Reese Wynnes Magnayon. I had to go because I am one of the Ninangs and I was already absent during the baptism so I really had to go to this event. I had lunch at home with Mama and watched 'Ray' on DVD. After the DVD, I got ready for the party. I fetched Leny then we went to Manila to Rein's place. Other Fleet people present were Jackie, Lynch and Darwin. It was a pleasant party. We had a great time eating the hotdogs with masrshmallows on a stick (which is my fave) and participating in the Bring Me game which won me a set of colored pencils with a sharpener. Of course, we also left with a goody bag. It feels nice to attend a kiddie party. It made me feel young again.

Maan @ 12:46 AM
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